--> Estana : Nocturnal Dreamer

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Thursday, September 30, 2004

Oops I Did It Again and Again !!

At times I really don't understand myself. Why is it that I feel suffocated easily? 1 wrong move and that's enough to be in my nuisance list and put me away in a corner. Am I so used to my comfort zone hovering in the orbit I subconciously repel invaders? Sometimes I get out of that corner...other times I'm stuck there. Houston we have a problem.

What am I to do to myself...Who can I whine to?..Mom wouldn't understand what exactly goes through my mind and how I feel. Maybe Dad would. But what's the point in telling them? Irrelevant. Sigh. I thought I was ready for this. Clearly I'm not. At the rate I'm going, its no wonder the comfort zone is getting more and more cosy each day. I'm not seeking refuge from it anymore...I'm practically living in it. And I happen to love it there.

Those who tried to contact me the whole of yesterday, sorry you guys couldn't get through my switched off hp. The usual case of solitude and shutting myself out to do some thinking. I was in JB anyways. The call alert is jamming my inbox!!! And sorry I don't plan to return the calls today. I'm just so plain lazy and tired. Oh so tired. Maybe its different if you're in love and being smothered seems like a romantic ideal way of getting attention. Or maybe I'm just a late bloomer. The after effect hits me way after the hitting is involved. Like that car commercial...(forgot the brand)....he swerved the car to avoid the truck...but he only pressed the horn metres after passing by it. To show that the car reacted way faster than we human would. Whatever.

Am I being petty? But have gone down this road too many of a time ... And time is not what I need. Just space. Darn big space.

Lucky for me it will be an all girlfriend eventful day later. Taxi !

~ indited by EstaNa @ 10:27 AM ~

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Interview With the 'Vampire'

Mr Interviewer : Hello....Ms Sabrina and Ms Haslina....thank you for coming. As this is just a part-time assignment basis, I will brief you on the responsbilites of this position and the objective of this company. As a trainer or instructor, you will be required to conduct application classes to either primary or secondary government schools. Ms Haslina, I see that you are a fresh grad..have you done any videos before ?

Ms Interviewee 1 : Yes as a school project.

Mr Interviewer : *Wrote what she said on her application form*. I see most of your time slots available are in the morning. Currently working anywhere ?

Ms Interviewee 1 : No. I'm just teaching tuition mostly in the evening. *Fingers twisting each other....seem pretty anxious*

Mr Interviewer : So you tick all these software studied them in poly?

Ms Interviewee 1 : Yes

Mr Interviewer : We wouldn't know how well both of you are versed in the softwares you have ticked. All instructors have to come and attend our training session. Even though you already know most of it you still need to cover the way we relay our programmes to the school students. It can be very different form the way you were thought.

Ms Interviewee 1 & 2 : *Nods head*

Mr Interviewer : Ok now....Ms Sabrina...*shifting his body position to face Ms Interviewee 2* I can see that you have quite an experience on your back. Why did you leave Singtel ? I thought that is quite a good stable job.

Ms Interviewee 2 : It was a temporary position and all part-time and temp staff's contract either was not extended or released.

Mr Interviewer : Oh ok. I see you have multimedia background too. Have you done any videos ?

Ms Interviewee 2 : Same as was a school project.

Mr Interviewer : Did it cover footage and post production ?

Ms Interviewee 2 : Yes, we had to do a TV commercial and we did the footage, storyboarding and post production like editing, voice overs including sound effects too.

Mr Interviewer : Ok good. *Scribbled some things on her application form*. Usually, on the first few assignments, you will be assisting an Instructor. You will have to attend to the students that need help on their PC. The classes will be about 30 to 40 students. That's why its crucial that all instuctor have an assistant. And it is also an opportunity for you to learn and observe how the courses are conducted because soon it will be your turn to take over once you are ready. Some assistant takes only 3 classes to be ready and some prefer to stay as assistants. Any questions ?

Ms Interviewee 2 : What about materials ?

Mr Interviewer : Everything is provided. If you would like to include your own we won't stop you. We leave all the creativity to you. Any more questions? *looking at both interviewees*

Ms Interviewee 2 : What is the mean of communication between instructors and the office here ?

Mr Interviewer : E-mail...we will send the schedule every Thursday. If you can or cannot make the time slot you will have to reply the email. Its very important. Because we need to put stand-by just in case. Call the office is you have an emergency and cannot make the class. And remember teaching at schools you HAVE to be punctual. They have fixed time table. You cannot afford to be late. We will assign you to a school that is near your home. Unless really can't be help. Any problems with that ?

Ms Interviewee 1 & 2 : Nope

Mr Interviewer : Don't worry about race discrimination. Here we don't have such a thing. I have many Malay trainers. We have malay softwares to teach too. And to teach malay software we need malay instructors. And as for female its easier to get the classes because most school request for female trainers. Especially an all-girls school. *smiling and really trying to make them feel comfortable being Malay and co-incidentally both doning the hejabs.*

Ms Interviewee 2 : *Raising an eyebrow....wondering why the mention of this...did we display discomfort.....look over to Ms Interviewee 1...her fingers still clasping and twisting each other.....nevermind let him talk..*

Mr Interviewer : We have many instructors that come and go. Because most of them are poly students or uni grads that are waiting for full-time employment. They will leave when school starts for them or when full-time employment comes. But we do have staff that have been with us for years. As for the rates, it is hourly. Depending on the course conducted and wether your an instructor or assistant. Everyone will have the same rate. If you are an instructor it will of course be higher than an assistant. The training session will usually be on Fri or Sat. So check your e-mail on Thurs.

Ms Interviewee 2 : So this means we will be expecting an email by this thurs.

Mr Interviewer : Yes.

Ms Interviewee 2 : What is your direct line ?

Mr Interviewer : 63------

Ms Interviewee 1 & 2 : *stores number in hp*

Mr Interviewer : That will be all. *big friendly smile*. Thank you for coming.

Ms Interviewee 2 : Thank you for your time *smile*

Ms Interviewee 1 : Thank you *smile*

All 3 left the meeting room.

But till now...NO EMAILS!! And the interview was last Monday. So much for no racial discrimination. Why even mention it in the first place? In case some of you still in the daze of royal bluriness....Ms Interviewee 2 is me!

Coincidently both of us are Multimedia Dip holdes and both of us dons the hejab. I'm 4 yrs her senior but she is senior in the aspects of height and size. That is forever and always the case for me. Me being the sardine-face did chat with her before we went in the room for the interview. She had no working experience hence I can sense her uneasiness and anxiety. I wonder if she received any emails. Should have gotten her contacts but the MRT came too soon and slipped her away.

Why do interviewers give us such hopes.....kar puik! Usually those who didn't give much promising instincts would be the one that gives us a chance. Wasted my blardy time! He should have just sucked my blood dry and save me the agony from anticipation!

~ indited by EstaNa @ 10:10 AM ~

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Into Abyss

There are just so many things I want to many goals I want to head feels like its about to burst due to the overload of information from my endless list. So many avenues I would like to venture but have yet to be blessed with the opportunities. I'm not just sitting here and waiting for it to happen just out of the blue.

Till what point will we feel fulfilled and satisfied or content?And what happens next after the accomplishment?

Arrrgh ....sudden mental block.... 2 missed calls??! shucks!!

My turn to overthrow Lady Cranko.


~ indited by EstaNa @ 1:53 PM ~

Friday, September 24, 2004

The Terminally Silly Man

Official site

After a hefty buffet at Cafe Vienna, headed straight to Shaw. Impromptu decision made to catch a movie... And it turned out to be quite a delightful choice. Either the trailers don't do the movie justice or I simply paid no attention to it. Probably both but more votes on the latter. Come to think of it, I even watched the making on TV. And I had no idea that Tom plays a Russian who could barely speak English. Where in the world were my mind and ears when my eyes pierced the TV box ?

A simple man with a mission from a town that has a name like an imported crispy snack, Krakozhia. Tom as Viktor, could barely speak or understand English..and what's the best way to educate oneself in the midst of New York ? Talk and laugh over coffee in Central Park...or at least from the publication of the sitcom Friends on the racks of Borders. Yes you heard me right. Thats how he started to learn the language. Being stateless due to the war that broke out back home left him 'unacceptable'. I cannot imagine any human having the patience to obey the orders of not setting foot out of the airport and accepting the fact that nothing can be done for him at the state of being stateless. That sounded as good as being erased from the face of the earth if the privilege of travelling and existence no longer exist. How can one stay put in the airport living in one of the gates for 9 months and surviving with custards n ketchups squeezed in between biscuits most of the time ? Thats up till he got a deal with Enrique the guy that drives around the in-flight food. Hey thats the guy from Dirty Dancing 2! What happened to him.... going from a leading sweaty-latino-dancing-hottie to a guy that puts on the jumper transporting the in-flight trays to and fro and looking like the janitor. And that moustache..urgh...makes him look like a boy who wants to look like a man. Maybe he should do a version of 'Not a Boy Not Yet A Man' in both English and Latin. Oh and the building built just for this movie is splendid...and all the extra casts...simply Spielberg.

Anyway, Viktor was an incredibly placid and cooperative man. Never once did he try to make his way out or making things difficult for the authorities. In fact, they had to even planned to get rid of him so that he can be someone else's problem. He tried all sort of ways to get food after he ridiculously lost the vouchers. And was successful at it. Then came in Catherine Zeta-Jones. The United Airlines stewardess. The trailer make her look all goofy and clumsy... well she's not all that. Just a victim of the lack-of-amusement janitor. This isn't exactly a love story. Not to me at least. More of an educational film of things to do at the airport under given circumstances. None of those fairy-tale ending. As usual, Catherine loves playing a heartless tart. I think I watch too much hollywood scripted movies that I can actually predict what the next line is or what is about to happen in certain scenes. Much to my movie partner's dismay last night thinking I already watched the movie. Heh.

Lets' summarise. Victor stuck in the airport. Nowhere to go without passport and visa. Viktor does normal things you do at home to make airport his home. Made friends with some of the Terminal's staff. Became a 'celebrity' in the airport. Met a woman. Fall in love. War in Krakozhia over. Accomplish the mission that brought him to New York.

No spoilers just in case for those who want to save the surprise leaving the $8.50 worthy. The kinda movie the whole family can enjoy. I would rate this movie 3 stars out of five.

~ indited by EstaNa @ 4:15 PM ~

Thursday, September 23, 2004

$1m Relationship

space space

I have been rooting for this couple (on the left) since Chip proved certain things worth betting on. Well deserved victory. What amazed me most is the fact that they are a married couple who work and live almost 23 hours together each day for the past 25 years and you would think that they would be the couple with all the angst and frustration battle against each other for having to put up with the partner through those years of matrimony...furthermore this could be the chance for either of them to vent their inner unsaid insecurities or vengeance. But none of those glory was displayed on TV. I just love the way Chip took the time to admire and appreciate the beautiful countries they have been privileged to set foot on regardless of their situation. Never once did he or Kim bad mouthed the other contestants under all circumstances. Oh and his humour just have great timing! And the fact that he helped the other contestants at times when it was crucial like the part when they had to pull those dreadful heavy blocks in Egypt. Brandon probably had forgotten that when he said Chip and Kim are not a trustworthy team. He even swam to Nicole to see if she was ok when he thought she was drowning and risking to be minutes behind the rest when he could have just continued searching for the clue in the shells. Even Colin and Christie was quick to call them "backstabber" despite the hand Chip had offered Colin countless times. Ironic how Brandon and Nicole are the self-proclaimed God-centred righteous people but they had cheated and lied their way out from day 1. Yeah sure Chip had his fare share of lies too but only when the game started to become critical last he didn't talk non-stop about being righteous. So go figure. Which only left me to wonder who was the righteous bunch. And who can forget Colin's ever so cocky attitude. Sure he is by far the most intelligent contestant in all the episodes but if he had tamed his confidence and ego they could have won the million buckaroos. Poor Christie had to put up with his constant foul-mouthed whining and pushing. Maybe he is just a victim of bad editing. Oh and Brandon, how lucky Nicole to have such a boyfriend who puts up with her whining and fickled domineering self. Never once in the all the episodes can we see Brandon losing his cool whenever Nicole couldn't pull through the challenges. All he did was stroke her hair gently and telling her its ok even when we know its not! Maybe Kim and Chip got along so fine because Kim was the more private and the woman-behind-the-man kinda partner and Chip was more vocal and a typical gentleman that takes on most of the road block without arguments and hesitation. 2 words for both Chip and Brandon -> RARE BREED!! Can I have one of those? Pwetty preeaaassseee!

The purpose of this entry is not to recap the show but the interesting display of 3 different kind of couples at the final stages of the game. Every one has their qualities, strengths and flaws.
I used to think the bad guys are usually with the nice women...the good guys are either married, gay or end up with nasty women. Its probably still true for most accounts but Chip sure proved me that there are some good men around for now. While the dating couples don't have that much effect on me, the married Chip and Kim's teamwork and compromisation had put me at awed. They had me at hello... Heh... For those who had travelled with friends and stayed in the same room for days would know how it is to actually learn more about the person you thought you already know. Not everyone would be lucky to have such great travelling mates. And I dare say that those wonderful travelling mates would turn out better life-long friends than those you see every other day normally. I'm probably not making sense to some but those who have experienced would understand where I'm getting at. Anyway, I just simply admire the relationship and respect Chip and Kim has for each other. Yeah sure we don't know what goes on behind the cameras but 12 episodes are sure enough to know a little.

Where can we find such a man who thinks his wife is still the most gorgeous woman even after 25 years of marriage? Chip had me at hello....


~ indited by EstaNa @ 8:40 AM ~

Monday, September 20, 2004

If I were....

Bored to tears. Hence resort to amusing myself with this forwarded questionnaire.

If I were a month I would be --> December.....duh!!
If I were a day of the week I would be --> the day i don't have to work!
If I were a time of day I would be --> bed time!!
If I were a planet I would be --> a lonely one..
If I were a sea animal I would be --> Hammerhead...jeng jeng jeng
If I were a direction I would be --> LOST!!
If I were a sin I would be --> tempting!!
If I were a liquid I would be --> your liquid dream!
If I were a tree I would be--> needing sun block lotions..
If I were a bird I would be --> the biggest one!! hurhurhuhur
If I were a tool I would be --> screwing you!
If I were a flower I would be --> waiting for zee bee
If I were a kind of weather I would be --> Summer
If I were a musical instrument, I would be --> blowing my own Horn!
If I were an animal, I would be --> such a BITCH
If I were an insect, I would be --> devouring your blood..
If I were a color, I would be --> a racist? Pinky!
If I were an emotion, I would be --> dreamy..
If I were a vegetable, I would be --> lifeless!!
If I were a song, I would be --> the reason to shake your booty!
If I were a movie, I would be --> a mega blockbuster box office hit!!
If I were a book, I would be --> Neverending!
If I were a place, I would be --> happening ;)
If I were a thing, I would be --> no-thing
If I were a taste, I would be --> an addiction... hurhurhur...
If I were a scent, I would be --> alluring...
If I were a word, I would be --> indescribable!
If I were a body part I would be --> sensuous...herkherkhekr
If I were a facial expression I would be --> constipated
If I were a subject in school I would be --> enticing..
If I were a cartoon character I would be --> Daisy duck...don't ask me why
If I were a shape I would be --> the shape of your heart.. :P
If I were a number I would be --> counting the door steps to you heart! *cheeesy*

ya ok so I didn't really answer them...

~ indited by EstaNa @ 7:10 PM ~

Sunday, September 19, 2004

My Not So Happy Ending

My lungs are about to explode!!!!!!!!!! From mere frustration. Maybe pulling every stand of my hair would help alleviate the tense. Me not answering the calls and the smses were not clear enough? Need a banner at the doorstep? Not only did he steer enough stories long time ago, my bluntness did not hit him either. I feel like blasting out with all the profanities!! I thought I had peace already for the past month...but Noooooo....he had to make another come back! Not even an ex boyfriend to begin with! The ex don't even irritate me this way. The thought of changing my hp number comes in mind again..... and its gonna cost me $30. Thats' peanuts and I would resort to it in a heartbeat. But there are other situations that would not allow me to at this moment. He knows I'm not answering his calls but yet he uses a blocked number so that I will pick it up not knowing its him. Blardy idiot! And it woke me from my sleep! So its no surprise that I gave him a piece of my mind with bullets piercing through his ears from my mouth..

Kesabaran macam dah takde ah.....kali ni rasa macam nak pecah kan hp tu pon ada. Orang apa yang tak faham bahasa ni?!?!?! Its ok to call and tanya khabar etc...tapi tak payah lah nak bebual merepek.... sakit ah telinga ni. If you show me enough respect I will do the same. I don't usually lose my cool..but this is just too much for me to take already.... Its like the rash that will never go away...the more ointment I rub the worst it gets!!

My last attempt , "Pls don't call or sms me anymore. I hv my reasons. Thank you.."

Is it mean of me? Well yes but I don't do this undeservingly. I just have no other way... Forgive me.

~ indited by EstaNa @ 10:29 PM ~

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Cinderella On Wheels....

...that whirls beneath the shoes...errrrk NOooo not the kiddy ones!!

This new pair of smooth sailing roller baby was put to the test last night. Yes I can still hear some of my friends saying "Aren't you a little too old for blading? You can just rent at East Coast... yack yack yack yack...." I snapped, "You are how old you wanna be ok...Those rental ones are stinky and such a pain to skate in.." Oh its just a pair of friggin' rollerblade. And its a form of workout exercise. Plus I'm just so sick of jogging already! I still remember my first pair back in Sec 1. It was a birthday gift from Dad for doing well in my final exams. I skated almost every day for 6 years till 4 wheels became 3 and eventually cracks on the sides. I don't know when will sports ever stop running itching through my veins but I sure do hope it won't. Courtesy of my mother's genes!

Oops ..I'm digressing again! Ok now where was I? Ah yes....Put on me wheels and plugged in me earphones and whooooosh off she goes! Warm up a little at the void deck to check if my skills are still intact. Whoopeeedeedooo......(not meaning to brag but I'm about to anyway..hurhurhurhur) Ehem ehem....all skills still intact like I never stopped blading after all these years!! Just a matter of time for the feet to get used to the feel of the weight and the sponged shoes. All set to hit the road...I mean pedestrian pavement. There was minimum exposure of lights and close to darkness in some places. That didn't stop me....

Time check :

10.30 pm - started off from Dunman Sec
_________ long stretch of pavement
_________ Tampines North Primary

10.48 pm - Sunplaza Park Traffic
_________ all the way down Ave 10 till the AFPD Factory

11.04 pm - Ghufran Mosque
_________Tampines Interchange outskirts
_________Tampines library
_________Gongshang pri

11.12 pm - TP JC
_________ Esso
_________ Condo

11.18 pm - Tampines Mart
_________ Grab thirst quencher @ 7-11

11.22 pm - same route back
_________ condo
_________ Esso

11.31 pm - void deck
_________ polish backward skating skills
_________ up & down Dunman stretch

11.53 pm - hit the stairs before the wheels turn to rats
_________ Cinderella's home!

Looking forward for further expeditions. Planning to head Toa Payoh soon. Crazy? Sometimes ah...but my craziness keeps my sanity in check. Because neighbourhood estates like Simei, Bedok etc had already been accomplished before. Anyway I can use Bus route 28 closest from home as a guide to Toa Payoh to avoid getting lost. Go the distance!!

Btw, thanks to maroon headgear almost flew off my head!! The life of it has been ripped off by a big-headed monster!! *Hmmmmmmmmmpppphh* *tanks ah tanks..palms clasped together*

Anyone game for a night of wheeling later through the night ? Hurhurhurhur....

~ indited by EstaNa @ 8:34 AM ~

Friday, September 17, 2004

Never Say Goodbye

Damn...My stoopid grin was just murdered by a thought. My baby Maryam is on the plane as I speak right now on her way to Heathrow Airport!! I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry!!!!!! I was busy with some things last week and I didn't manage to go to your farewell party! Gosh I feel so horrible. If only you have told me in advance you were flying off last night I would have send you off at the airport.

Yes you choose to walk on air and abandon the solid ground. A dream you've long wanted to be among dead poets and authors. Remember when you were 13 and I was 15.... that was when the earth we walked entwined. And ever since, petals scattered along the steps. The troubles we got into. The singing and dancing. The times I wound up at your door. The trip we made. The breakups and makeups.

You chose your dream and now you're living it. Will come and visit and maybe we can sip tea by Lake District while the wind blows the dried leaves and the sun scorch your rosy cheeks....

I'll be missing you.


~ indited by EstaNa @ 10:10 AM ~

Hooray Hooray...Its the HOli Holidays..

errr......not really....its just that my parents are out of town. And thats what my mom thinks when she is not around. Like as if we will have a party in the house. "Ah holiday ah korang eh... nanti tak sembahyang suboh...tengok tv satu hari....yadda yadda..." The normal assumption of a parent who is going to leave the nest for a while. Its ony 3 days....she should have told that to my younger bro. Like helloooooo I'm not over that phase already!! *pout* Then again parents always forget that the kids are all grown up.... sheesh. Yeah yeah wait till I'm a mum...i know i know! Yikes. While I'm typing this, the dream I had came back to me. Oops head rush head rush! Errrmmmm.....the feeling is nice but whoa. Enuff said. That aside.

'Heppi...sha la la nice to be happy....sha la la la.....'
No lah not because the 'government' isn't around. Must have reason to be happy izzit? I just can't stop smiling since last night. Not even the stoopid result of SI could stop me. If Nana is the best vocalist of the whole lot like the judges say then why isn't she chosen instead of Maia?? Jebroni pieces of monkey crap!!! Looks like the wildcard bunch have more vocalist than the the other finalists. And why is Taufiq in there? And I don't mean that in a bad way. Well because we all know he wouldn't win so put a non-threatening talent will do no harm to the others. And I'm not saying he isn't good. He is but come on! If Nana was in the top now that would be a threat and a big question to why she didn't make it. Yeah yeah because its people's choice. Well boo hoo too bad Singaporeans voted superficially. Vote for who you like rather than who has the talent. Shame on us. Imagine those karaoke singers from the top 12 contestants (I better not say names) in the World Idol, double shame on us. The only World Idol standards I would say is Leandra, Jessea, Beverly, Maia (if she choose the right song), Nana (too bad she isn't in). Daphne you're really different and cool to listen to but have yet to blow us away with the voice. Btw, Benjamin Eio is from Echo wonder he looks it me or he uncannily looks like Benedict Goh? Next week unsung heroes. Weii!! Why never invite our fren Ari! He was the coconut hero afterall....hurhurhur....

See even that didn't stop my silly grin. What shall I do today..hmmmm...
*thinking mode...tapping finger on the chin*


~ indited by EstaNa @ 7:04 AM ~

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Sorry Don't Seem To Be The Hardest Word

I think I lost strands of hair, a couple of brain cells, few energy tissues, drops of tears and bags of emotions. Why weren't pounds of flesh included in the losses? Why? Why?!
How do one feels physically bumped out but mentally and emotionally rejuvenated?
Anyhoo..... job hunt still on the go. But no luck yet. Anyone want to hire me ? I make great peppermint tea! *Nyam nyam nyam....*

When I know I made a mistake and willing to accept and realise the wrongs I did, its a big step towards an apology. Say it out loud to myself or the ones who deserve it. Sort of like a terminal disease patient, when he or she admits the illness openly to himself or others is coming to terms with his condition. That way the denial is stripped off from the surfaces. Whether the apology recipient accepts it wholeheartedly and sincerely, that is not for me to decide or control. Usually we humans would be too busy feeding our egos that we don't see what can be done if its put aside for that moment. Asians are suppose to be the more polite, amiable and considerate people compared to the westerners. But it seems that they practise affections (between families) and apologies more openly than we do. Although I can say that our generation are slowly moving towards it. I remember when I was young, we were forced to shake hands, say sorry and make up regardless of the tantrums and disagreements. And it is still practised today. Though I can't remember when was the last time I needed to do that.. And its a beautiful thing that we Muslims are summoned to seek forgiveness in the month of Syawal and whenever necessary. I personally feels that it cleanses me spiritually and remind me that I'm just a humble servant.

Speaking of which, that bombing in Jakarta left a disturbing image in my mind of that girl with a hole in her limbs carried by a man in the streets. And the other day, an Ustaz brought pictures and a video of the sept 11 to remind us of doomsday. When will this ever stop...the killings of innocents....the never-ending prejudication of Islam. Why kill when they know that its a sin to take a defenseless life? So called fighting in the name of the religion. Do they not know that even Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. said "Do good upon those who are unkind to you" (Berbaiklah kepada orang yang membuat kejahatan terhadap engkau)". Sigh. One day it will all end....InsyaAllah...


~ indited by EstaNa @ 11:25 AM ~

Friday, September 10, 2004

Standing Still

Only 5 days ever since and yet again time was standing still on me. Every minute that went by felt like a slow motion thrill ride going at 1 frame-per-second. And imagine all the facial and emotional glory to the effect of that. What a sight.

An overwhelming rollercoaster eventful week. An event that tied loose ends. Absence that will hopefully become a perpetual presence. God sure has His way of granting recongregation in answering the prayers of some. A hoped for event but certainly an unexpected surprise. Feels like we discovered a cure for cancer. Yeah that is how intense it all is. But for a good cause. Let's hope the 'disease' won't encounter a relapse.

2 days and Monday come. Praying for it all to be over. And may se7en becomes One....


Eternal Resurrection

Needless unspoken truth
Between souls that were yearning
A reconstitution still in its youth
Purging sores that were no longer burning
Strings of events noone can comprehend
Breaking the impossible against the odds
The phase that they can only defend
Through guilt pigmentation on its rightful spots
A force that binded them together
Was the force that lead to falter
Once more it makes another return
In hope for eternal resurrection

~ indited by EstaNa @ 1:46 PM ~

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

The Aftermath

What a long weekend. No I didn't go for no trip. But some mission that I've been waiting for has been accomplished. Feels like a huge load lifted from my chest...and yes the boobies are still intact. It has only been 3 days since I last blogged but it seem like weeks away. Why do time has such effect on me?

Still feeling a tad bit stuporous, worried, helpless over some news yesterday. Sigh. Double sigh. Before the weekend, I had so many things going through my mind that I wanna blog about. So many things I would like to write and share. The drive is just gone. Somebody revive me please.

Ah well...I'll bounce always.


~ indited by EstaNa @ 7:37 AM ~